Twilight..................

Just tried a hand at penning prose. Hope if at least someone can like it.

I am going to meet her today. It is fairly important we have a sit down. Cause this concerns our lives. And on my mp3 player, Led zeppelin is playing “Kashmir”. Groove beat. Strings. Bass. The bus is moving. Familiar scenes. This is an oft visited area. Again the high on that drum roll. All I can think about is the song. How can someone make the song so good? The simple drumming, the crescendos et al. Bus takes a right turn. Time for me to get down. I move down the aisle, shoving my bulk around on everyone, rousing them from their everyday sleeps. I am not a regular on this bus. The one that takes me to my haven is usually half empty. Not this though.

But I had to get down. The ice cream parlor. The bus heaves to a sighing stop and I descend to check my watch. 5 minutes before time. The Robert Plants wail. The groove. It was still there. Nothing better than an ice cream, I thought and helped myself to one.

Nodding my head to the seemingly lazy beats. Not long before, I managed to finish the cup. Still Kashmir playing. Puzzled? Oh then remembered that I had put the song on repeat. Just can’t get too much of it. Hmmmm.

She was 7 minutes late. I could spot her from a mile off. She looked pretty. As always. But today was different. I was not the same as always. Listening to that song, had introduced in me that kind of lust, that ecstasy that comes from kissing ones lover and nothing else can satiate it. Obscene is the right word for me now.

She stops her bike, looks at me and smiles. She parks it and looks around for any whistle toting police men. No one in sight. One sigh and she heaves it onto the stand. Oh god she looks wonderful. Those large eyes. Innocence. Calm. She looks at me again. Smiles. Only Kashmir was stopping me from having panic attacks. She crosses the street, very careful. Extra careful, my dear, I seemed to say.

“Hi. Wassup?”

“Nuthin. Was just reading a book. How are you?”

“Shall we get something to eat?”

“I am not hungry, but if you are I will give you company.”

I had the slyest smile anyone could have, on my face. Evil. Lusty.

We entered the nearby Pizza hut outlet and ordered something. She sat opposite to me, the twilight casting a brilliant red and violet on her face. Lovely. Anyone would be in love with her. But the one-on-one was for some reason.

“So……” I began “how was your day?”

“Nothing much. Actually I spent pretty much all my time thinking about why you like me. I mean an extrovert person like you could find a like minded girl for yourself easily. Why me?”

“Is it such a crime? I can not say that I did it on purpose. It just happened. “

“No no, it’s not wrong for someone to love somebody. But in this case why me? What was so special in me? We barely know each other……………….”

She kept talking. Rather she kept asking questions. And I vehemently defended myself. For every question of her. I did not even have to think. All the while I had this little voice in my head go

“Oh, let the sun beat down upon my face, stars to fill my dream
I am a traveler of both time and space, to be where I have been…………………………..”

Where? How? I run my hand into my shirt pocket, to find the mp3 player resting there, switched off. Where was the sound coming from? And all this happening when I am replying to her questions and her reasons for denial. How is this possible?

“Oh, pilot of the storm that leaves no trace, like thoughts inside a dream
You've the map that led me to that place, yellow desert stream
My Shangri-La beneath the summer moon, I will return again
Sure as the dust that blows high in June, when moving through Kashmir………….”

I am walking in Kashmir, the cold evening. Hand in hand with her. She looks beautiful. More than ever. And as the sun sets. I turn around to cover her from it. And kiss her.

“Hey you here?”

I wake up with a jolt. Oh, day fucking dreaming!!! But I did not sweat for one strange moment. Why? How is that possible? You have to be at least surprised when you wake up like that? But I am not thinking any of that. I want to kiss her. The sun is going down. This is the time. Aahhhhh………..

We kept talking till it was way past all time. Dinner time. She asked me to come to her place for a homely simple dinner.

“Yes. Yes I am coming. How can I not come?”

But that’s not what came out of my mouth. Rather a very stupid,

“No I will be heading home. Need some sleep. Have to be in office early tomorrow.”

Bloody hell, how could I say that?

“Oh, father of the four winds, fill my sails, across the sea of years
with no provision but an open face, along the straits of fear
ohh……………………………”

Sweet lord no, Kashmir again. She is waving me goodbye. Her bike billows up a puff of smoke. She is gone. I know I will meet her again. But what did I tell her all this while. Oh boy, I am going to have a hard time figuring that out.

How I wished I had kissed her before she left. That I had not let go of her hand. Not let her get out of my sight. But the twilight is gone. It is dark now. I shout out to an auto and ask him to carry me back to my place. “Half return honar sahib.” “Chalel.” Stick the earphones in my ears, switch the mp3 player ON. There it is again. Kashmir.