Ok, lets get down to business. Yeah the last post was a little show-off thing, but the gist of it all was very true.....but apparently people could just see the showing off........Yeah my puny brain has been inundated by words from Barron's. But there are some of these words,which i just could not get my head around. I do not know who the fuck uses these words, but i think a list of them will at least prove enlightening......
1.gerrymander -
Which means - Gerrymandering is a form of redistribution in which electoral district or constituency boundaries are deliberately modified for electoral advantage.
which sounds like - the act of a politician taking a walk after downing a good liter of Jack Daniels.....
2. filibuster
which means - a form of obstruction in a legislature or other decision-making body. An attempt is made to extend indefinitely a debate upon a proposal in order to delay the progress or completely prevent a vote on the proposal taking place.
which sounds like - A juvenile crime detective.
3.legerdmein
which means - sleight of hand
which sounds like - a genital disorder
4. vituperative
which means - uttering or given to censure
which sounds like - The oppposite of imperative
5. crotchety
which means - whimsical
which sounds like - Sounding similar to scratching the crotch.
6. traduce
which means - exposing to slander
which sounds like - treading repeatedly over lettuce leaves.
7. Kismet
which means - fate.
(forgive me, but these insipid farts have just taken an Urdu word and fancy thinking of it as new)
8. coquette
which means - flirt
which sounds like - French.....hate that language.....bet the source for this was a French equivalent of "wild and out of control dick"
9. verdigris
which means - green coating on copper which has been exposed to the weather
which sounds like - Something the Greek secrete when they are embarassed.
10. patina
which means - green crust on old bronze works
which sounds like - An Italian secretion maybe?
11. pastiche
which means - imitation of anothers style in writing or musical composition
which sounds like - a well cultivated moustache styled like a pasture
12. opprobrium
which means - infamy
which sounds like - the state of mind of one after snorting a shit load of cocaine.
13. syllogism
which means - deceptive or specious argument
which sounds like - an allergy/state of aversion to studying words
.......Thats all for now......more to follow..........
Friday, May 29, 2009
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Bleak........
The antediluvian radio set sitting dusty and musty in the panwallahs shack across the street was spewing out some insipid Bollywood musical buffoonery. Barely reaching my ears, but earning some distinction. Am staring at the stretch of tarmac two storeys below me called the Assembly Road. It’s a cold and windy night, cold one for mid summer. Identity crisis, I think. My ocular senses scan the piece of grey pressed stone in perspective, but can’t seem to find anything of any interest, any aberration. Nomadic behavior. At least they do not wander without reason. And when the brain does not register anything in that department is when I realize that I am clutching a book. “Clarkson: On Cars” it says. With the picture of a balding curly topped Limey with a donkey juxtaposed on the cover page. Clutched by the same hand that wears the found ring. Lots of data/information. Very little knowledge. None at all, in fact.
Bleak setting, but might be the perfect wall for a ground breaking mural, is what I would like to think. After all a little mind wandering mustn’t be so hard after a days hard work (read that as trying to shovel word lists into the mnemonic area). A paradox, since I am completely aware that nothing of that significance will happen. In about, another 30 minutes or so (since it is 10:30 p.m. and I have somehow convinced myself that sleeping at 11 is a good habit), I will start feeling sleepy and then drop cadaver asleep in a very gauche and blatant manner. Day over.
And then the next and so on………..how does one ever figure out what to do? Is being dictated, on what your opus for the day is the sign of the times? Do our brains exist just to see a line of tick-marks on the day’s to-do list? I would like to think otherwise. Really. For now, Clarkson’s rant on watches and diaries beckons, so I would like this to be the coda to mine. Maybe the road will have some interesting answers when I look at it the next time.
Bleak setting, but might be the perfect wall for a ground breaking mural, is what I would like to think. After all a little mind wandering mustn’t be so hard after a days hard work (read that as trying to shovel word lists into the mnemonic area). A paradox, since I am completely aware that nothing of that significance will happen. In about, another 30 minutes or so (since it is 10:30 p.m. and I have somehow convinced myself that sleeping at 11 is a good habit), I will start feeling sleepy and then drop cadaver asleep in a very gauche and blatant manner. Day over.
And then the next and so on………..how does one ever figure out what to do? Is being dictated, on what your opus for the day is the sign of the times? Do our brains exist just to see a line of tick-marks on the day’s to-do list? I would like to think otherwise. Really. For now, Clarkson’s rant on watches and diaries beckons, so I would like this to be the coda to mine. Maybe the road will have some interesting answers when I look at it the next time.
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Happy Birthday Myles.........
Well, we are late as ever. But not by much....as we are about to interview the famous Pulsar 180 DTS-i, Myles (M)......owned by some jerk called Manan Dedhia. Myles just celebrated his first birthday on the 27th of April 2009 and we, The StinkWheel Magazine (SW) had the honour of snapping up a first and quick interview with this zing thing!
SW: Millions of best wishes, belatedly....... your first birthday. How do you feel, a year older?
M: Its just been a year, but the way i am ridden and places i have been to make me feel like a year is a tad too less. Imagine shoving a bulk of 90kgs and doing 100kms a day..........makes your back ache just listening to it, doesn't it?
SW : Oh boy! thats some load! But you are no slouch either! Those plentiful 180 ceecees and 150 kg dry weight must have given your owner, Manan, some wet pants?
M: oh yeah! Several! Just this afternoon, on the way to Paud.........missed a stupid Toyota Camry by a whisker........the fat ass knows to speed up. Control, well thats a different story.
SW : Interesting to hear that on your owner! What is he? a complete fag?
M: No, no no no! Don't get me wrong here. He takes care of me with all his heart. But just the fact that he isn't very gentle with his riding style.
SW: Even so, some pleasant memories?
M : Oh ...oh yeah! Lotsa them.........The Chateau Indage trip, Pune-Kolhapur-Pune speed run, Purandar and Mulshi .......the last one was amazing until the time the robbers struck.
SW: Bloody hell! You were robbed!
M : Oh, just of a fuel pipe. Got that bit from a group of bikers passing from there. But from all the things that Manan tells me, he and his friends seem to have lost a lot of stuff......poor chaps!
SW : Oh and these bruises? these look fresh..........Like to tell us about them?
M : Yeah, but not with a lot of pleasure.....thats from an accident.......vividly remember that one.......the night of 16th December according to the human calendar........Me and Manan hit the deck hard trying to avoid a bunch of assholes who were moonlighting at 12 in the night, with no head lights on the wrong side of the road. We did suffer a lot of bruises, but luckily no fatal injuries.
SW : What was the worst?
M : I bent both my bull bars and also ended up twisting the gear lever and Manan had 5 stitches on the sole of his left foot. Recovery time was around 17 days.
SW : Well, those were the highlights, the special days.......what about routine life? How is it in Pune?
M : Well don't even get me started on this fucking topic! For starters, Puneites, and i hate to say this, lack traffic sense. Period. Not even a little bit. No telling who will show his/her headlight from which side. Not blaming it on the vehicles of course, the owners are the culprits. Almost every vehicle carries bruises like me or even worse. Whats more they are never kept clean, never serviced, not cared for etc etc............fucking owner cunts! I am very fortunate to have a caring owner.........gives me a bath every Saturday and wipes me clean everyday.
SW : Wowowowow! That was acerbic........is it so bad?
M : Yes it is....you just have to spend one day here and the halogen will shine on you. I have the privilege of riding on some of Pune's least crowded and smoothest roads. But not all. And the heart of the city is a chaos locomotive. With some really bad roads.
SW : well, enough of this serious stuff......banter time now. Any dream dates?
M : Nah, not as yet............once i was parked next to a gorgeous VFR, but the bulk of it gave me creeps. I think , an MV Agusta or a Ducati would give my gear lever the ride kind of vibes.
SW : Any awkward moments?
M : ummmm..............a sort of drunk dog trying to find a place to let loose his goose. Had to choose between my rear wheel and the lamp post. Thankfully the light chose to shine in his head rather brightly.
SW : Any angry ones?
M : Yeah, i think thats the thing you feel when the they try to pull the umbilical cord out and empty my tank of all the Petrol it has. Felt like running over his dick with the load of two Manan's sitting on my back.
SW : Favourite road in Pune?
M: oh yeah... definitely.......the piece of tarmac which links FC Road and Law College Road, sweeping past the BMCC gates. That is a killer stretch, the incarnation of Monica Belucci in tar world. Just try riding there when it is pitch dark. The way the reflectors on the road light the way up is just beautiful. Not to mention the high speed curves and the blind bends. Its a little dangerous at that time, but very rewarding nevertheless.
SW : Favourite Color?
M: Ok dimwit.....lets play Guess the Shade..........will give u some clues...........Ferrari, strawberry, Ducati, blood and the hue of your ass after i hit it with an iron rod..........that enough?
SW : Drink???
M : Ummm.........tuffie..........haven't tried bio-ethanol as yet, but i think "Sizzle", comprising of Castrol 4T engine oil and Bardahl oil supplement has been the best.
SW : Top figure on the speedometer? When and where?
M: Thats easy........120 kph on the way to Kolhapur from Pune. On the section between Karad and Kolhapur, Vinay on his Pulsar 200 and Manan piloting me, went completely crazy. Hitting speeds like never before. The 200 did 124 kays per hour.
SW: And the slowest?
M : Hahahaa........the several times i have been to Agdi Bhargachch Chowk.... the needle does not seem to climb 2000 revs. And thats sad. All pain, no gain.
SW : Dream run...from where to where? And why?
M : The Konkan ghats. If the tarmac is good, i think that would be the ride of a life time. At least for me. Or maybe a high speed run from Pune to Bangalore. The 4 lane highway is already in place there. Maybe a ride to the Khardungla Pass?
SW : Hmmm.....so to put it into perspective, 9000+ kms of city and highway riding.......how does it all measure up?
M : Put it into perspective..........sometimes you do sound as cocky as Manan.......put into perspective, one word for the journey......etc etc............well i was made to be ridden.....fast and hard and show off my bling........i do that.........the rest is left to the owner.......as long as he takes care of me. And the way i am made. I mean the gear box problem has been a long standing issue but thats about it. All i can say is 9000 kms and still going strong.
So that was it.....the word by word account of our chat with the speed sensation, Myles.........see you again, not too soon i hope.......Ride fast and safe.......
SW: Millions of best wishes, belatedly....... your first birthday. How do you feel, a year older?
M: Its just been a year, but the way i am ridden and places i have been to make me feel like a year is a tad too less. Imagine shoving a bulk of 90kgs and doing 100kms a day..........makes your back ache just listening to it, doesn't it?
SW : Oh boy! thats some load! But you are no slouch either! Those plentiful 180 ceecees and 150 kg dry weight must have given your owner, Manan, some wet pants?
M: oh yeah! Several! Just this afternoon, on the way to Paud.........missed a stupid Toyota Camry by a whisker........the fat ass knows to speed up. Control, well thats a different story.
SW : Interesting to hear that on your owner! What is he? a complete fag?
M: No, no no no! Don't get me wrong here. He takes care of me with all his heart. But just the fact that he isn't very gentle with his riding style.
SW: Even so, some pleasant memories?
M : Oh ...oh yeah! Lotsa them.........The Chateau Indage trip, Pune-Kolhapur-Pune speed run, Purandar and Mulshi .......the last one was amazing until the time the robbers struck.
SW: Bloody hell! You were robbed!
M : Oh, just of a fuel pipe. Got that bit from a group of bikers passing from there. But from all the things that Manan tells me, he and his friends seem to have lost a lot of stuff......poor chaps!
SW : Oh and these bruises? these look fresh..........Like to tell us about them?
M : Yeah, but not with a lot of pleasure.....thats from an accident.......vividly remember that one.......the night of 16th December according to the human calendar........Me and Manan hit the deck hard trying to avoid a bunch of assholes who were moonlighting at 12 in the night, with no head lights on the wrong side of the road. We did suffer a lot of bruises, but luckily no fatal injuries.
SW : What was the worst?
M : I bent both my bull bars and also ended up twisting the gear lever and Manan had 5 stitches on the sole of his left foot. Recovery time was around 17 days.
SW : Well, those were the highlights, the special days.......what about routine life? How is it in Pune?
M : Well don't even get me started on this fucking topic! For starters, Puneites, and i hate to say this, lack traffic sense. Period. Not even a little bit. No telling who will show his/her headlight from which side. Not blaming it on the vehicles of course, the owners are the culprits. Almost every vehicle carries bruises like me or even worse. Whats more they are never kept clean, never serviced, not cared for etc etc............fucking owner cunts! I am very fortunate to have a caring owner.........gives me a bath every Saturday and wipes me clean everyday.
SW : Wowowowow! That was acerbic........is it so bad?
M : Yes it is....you just have to spend one day here and the halogen will shine on you. I have the privilege of riding on some of Pune's least crowded and smoothest roads. But not all. And the heart of the city is a chaos locomotive. With some really bad roads.
SW : well, enough of this serious stuff......banter time now. Any dream dates?
M : Nah, not as yet............once i was parked next to a gorgeous VFR, but the bulk of it gave me creeps. I think , an MV Agusta or a Ducati would give my gear lever the ride kind of vibes.
SW : Any awkward moments?
M : ummmm..............a sort of drunk dog trying to find a place to let loose his goose. Had to choose between my rear wheel and the lamp post. Thankfully the light chose to shine in his head rather brightly.
SW : Any angry ones?
M : Yeah, i think thats the thing you feel when the they try to pull the umbilical cord out and empty my tank of all the Petrol it has. Felt like running over his dick with the load of two Manan's sitting on my back.
SW : Favourite road in Pune?
M: oh yeah... definitely.......the piece of tarmac which links FC Road and Law College Road, sweeping past the BMCC gates. That is a killer stretch, the incarnation of Monica Belucci in tar world. Just try riding there when it is pitch dark. The way the reflectors on the road light the way up is just beautiful. Not to mention the high speed curves and the blind bends. Its a little dangerous at that time, but very rewarding nevertheless.
SW : Favourite Color?
M: Ok dimwit.....lets play Guess the Shade..........will give u some clues...........Ferrari, strawberry, Ducati, blood and the hue of your ass after i hit it with an iron rod..........that enough?
SW : Drink???
M : Ummm.........tuffie..........haven't tried bio-ethanol as yet, but i think "Sizzle", comprising of Castrol 4T engine oil and Bardahl oil supplement has been the best.
SW : Top figure on the speedometer? When and where?
M: Thats easy........120 kph on the way to Kolhapur from Pune. On the section between Karad and Kolhapur, Vinay on his Pulsar 200 and Manan piloting me, went completely crazy. Hitting speeds like never before. The 200 did 124 kays per hour.
SW: And the slowest?
M : Hahahaa........the several times i have been to Agdi Bhargachch Chowk.... the needle does not seem to climb 2000 revs. And thats sad. All pain, no gain.
SW : Dream run...from where to where? And why?
M : The Konkan ghats. If the tarmac is good, i think that would be the ride of a life time. At least for me. Or maybe a high speed run from Pune to Bangalore. The 4 lane highway is already in place there. Maybe a ride to the Khardungla Pass?
SW : Hmmm.....so to put it into perspective, 9000+ kms of city and highway riding.......how does it all measure up?
M : Put it into perspective..........sometimes you do sound as cocky as Manan.......put into perspective, one word for the journey......etc etc............well i was made to be ridden.....fast and hard and show off my bling........i do that.........the rest is left to the owner.......as long as he takes care of me. And the way i am made. I mean the gear box problem has been a long standing issue but thats about it. All i can say is 9000 kms and still going strong.
So that was it.....the word by word account of our chat with the speed sensation, Myles.........see you again, not too soon i hope.......Ride fast and safe.......
Monday, April 20, 2009
Worlds apart...........
I stood in the balcony. Couldn't have the shirt on. It was fricking hot. The body all sticky and smelly with sweat.And standing in that balcony gave a sense of being trapped between two worlds. The warm air from the room gently perspiring my back. And the rare waft of cool breeze from outside, brushing against my face whenever it got the opportunity to.
Two worlds, two choices. One had to be done away with. The cool breeze is instantly inviting. for a leisurely walk. Through the streets, the heart of the neighborhood. With tall trees standing guard, sentinels protecting the huge cement superstructures. And the endless, peaceful silence. Where one could hear his own heart beat.
Or the warm room. Bearing the brunt of the brutal summer. Unbearable. With books all around. Study. Work. Make. Plan.The fan sending down blasts of hot air with a methodical, rhythmic whirring sound. The computer spewing out some melodies.Clothes lying around. The books in the rack, gathering dust.Smiling faces, staring from the shaky frame. The ever present creaking of the door, diabolical. Weary.......
Then the lights on my phone go up and it rings. Her voice is always so soothing. So clear, you could almost see yourself in reflection. And then the two worlds make no difference. For some time, i am free from the two obvious choices i see. I have secretly created for myself, the third. And i cling on to it as hard as i can. Anchor my stricken ship to that rock until the tide beckons. For that stretch of time, those many ticks of the watch-arms, i am liberated from mortal sights and sounds. For then, i can only feel a bright light around me, enveloping my world. And no more do i choose to wake up from that elysian feeling. At least till the sky sees an orange shade. For then, my world is perfect.Functions as i want it to. Obeys. Me........
The sun must then but rise. And with it brings the omnipotent question, the persistent choice, around again. And this time there is no escape. Forget or remember? Surrender or struggle? Win or lose?
Two worlds, two choices. One had to be done away with. The cool breeze is instantly inviting. for a leisurely walk. Through the streets, the heart of the neighborhood. With tall trees standing guard, sentinels protecting the huge cement superstructures. And the endless, peaceful silence. Where one could hear his own heart beat.
Or the warm room. Bearing the brunt of the brutal summer. Unbearable. With books all around. Study. Work. Make. Plan.The fan sending down blasts of hot air with a methodical, rhythmic whirring sound. The computer spewing out some melodies.Clothes lying around. The books in the rack, gathering dust.Smiling faces, staring from the shaky frame. The ever present creaking of the door, diabolical. Weary.......
Then the lights on my phone go up and it rings. Her voice is always so soothing. So clear, you could almost see yourself in reflection. And then the two worlds make no difference. For some time, i am free from the two obvious choices i see. I have secretly created for myself, the third. And i cling on to it as hard as i can. Anchor my stricken ship to that rock until the tide beckons. For that stretch of time, those many ticks of the watch-arms, i am liberated from mortal sights and sounds. For then, i can only feel a bright light around me, enveloping my world. And no more do i choose to wake up from that elysian feeling. At least till the sky sees an orange shade. For then, my world is perfect.Functions as i want it to. Obeys. Me........
The sun must then but rise. And with it brings the omnipotent question, the persistent choice, around again. And this time there is no escape. Forget or remember? Surrender or struggle? Win or lose?
Thursday, April 9, 2009
25 random things about me....
Well, time to enlist. Lets see.........
1. I like being alone. Doing nothing. Sitting in front of my laptop and maybe watching the same movie over and over again. Chances are good that it might be "Remember the Titans".
2. I am neither practical nor emotional. I try to keep a good balance between the two, but it always ends up completely wrong.
3. I like to put people around me at complete ease. I go to great lengths to achieve that.
4. I am hardly possessive about anything, except maybe my bike (..............that too very little.....). Sometimes i am troubled by this fact. But not so much as to lose any sleep over it. The only real exception to this is my Mclaren Mercedes cap. A heartfelt ........."Sorry Komu............!"
5. Music, truly my life. As much as this fact is well known, i can't seem to be emphatic enough about it. I really hope that i end up like Lars Ulrich and that Skepsis plays to 50,000 fans every night.
6. I love head banging and going to gigs. Even if the gigs turn out to be shitty (....very rarely, but yeah they do happen......)......i still enjoy the hell out of them!
7. I hate hurting people. Even if i am being hurt in the bargain.
8. I used to be short tempered and a PhD in profanities. Heavy metal music solved the temper problem.......:D......the profanities have remained stead fast though.
9. I am an epicure as well as a good cook. This definitely is self praise, but it is also the truth.
10. A total chocolate buff! Am targetting the record for maximum Cad-B's in one go right now.......
11. I love cars and bikes. Have probably dreamed every night about them for the last 10 years.
My scariest moment came when i revved the Hayabusa hard in the first gear. I have never been near one again.
12. I pick things up with ease. And become really good at them. It is the sustaining that has proved hard.
13. I survive on adrenaline. When the testorsterone levels in my bloodstream are high, do i get the feeling that i am living life at the fullest and also think and act better. Things done in that mode are memorable.
14. I am used to being taken for granted. It does not hurt anymore. Or rather i am immune to that pain.
15. I am very bad at writing reviews. About anything..............
16. I am a fluid liar. Or rather used to be.
17. I detest flirting around or "checking" girls out for the fun of it. I think it is a senseless way to pass your time and in some cases extremely offensive.
18. I have a police record.
19. Act now, think later or never......has always been my motto when executing things.
20. I kid myself that i can someday compose poetry like the English greats and stand shoulder to shoulder in the pages of literature history with Wordsworth and Keats (......my favourites....)
21. My dream garage would hold the following : MV Agusta F4 Serie Oro, Mclaren F1 LM, Rolls Royce Phantom and the Lamborghini Murcielago.
22. I am a die hard Mclaren fan and hence naturally abhor Ferrari. Mika Hakkinnen is my hero. I don't like that crooked faced Michael Schumacher even though he is, statistically, the greatest driver in F1. Have been involved in a lot of fights and arguments over this with countless people.
23. I have a problem with authority. All they do is try to pin me down. (Thats what i feel anyways)
24. Exaggeration for me is the essence of writing. Subtlety for now, is just the subtle variation in exaggeration.
25. I want my blog to have more visitors. But i also feel that advertising my blog is cheap and should not be done..........:D
I do not know if these are THE 25 things to be penned or whatever. But i leave it unto others to decide. Thanks Indi.
1. I like being alone. Doing nothing. Sitting in front of my laptop and maybe watching the same movie over and over again. Chances are good that it might be "Remember the Titans".
2. I am neither practical nor emotional. I try to keep a good balance between the two, but it always ends up completely wrong.
3. I like to put people around me at complete ease. I go to great lengths to achieve that.
4. I am hardly possessive about anything, except maybe my bike (..............that too very little.....). Sometimes i am troubled by this fact. But not so much as to lose any sleep over it. The only real exception to this is my Mclaren Mercedes cap. A heartfelt ........."Sorry Komu............!"
5. Music, truly my life. As much as this fact is well known, i can't seem to be emphatic enough about it. I really hope that i end up like Lars Ulrich and that Skepsis plays to 50,000 fans every night.
6. I love head banging and going to gigs. Even if the gigs turn out to be shitty (....very rarely, but yeah they do happen......)......i still enjoy the hell out of them!
7. I hate hurting people. Even if i am being hurt in the bargain.
8. I used to be short tempered and a PhD in profanities. Heavy metal music solved the temper problem.......:D......the profanities have remained stead fast though.
9. I am an epicure as well as a good cook. This definitely is self praise, but it is also the truth.
10. A total chocolate buff! Am targetting the record for maximum Cad-B's in one go right now.......
11. I love cars and bikes. Have probably dreamed every night about them for the last 10 years.
My scariest moment came when i revved the Hayabusa hard in the first gear. I have never been near one again.
12. I pick things up with ease. And become really good at them. It is the sustaining that has proved hard.
13. I survive on adrenaline. When the testorsterone levels in my bloodstream are high, do i get the feeling that i am living life at the fullest and also think and act better. Things done in that mode are memorable.
14. I am used to being taken for granted. It does not hurt anymore. Or rather i am immune to that pain.
15. I am very bad at writing reviews. About anything..............
16. I am a fluid liar. Or rather used to be.
17. I detest flirting around or "checking" girls out for the fun of it. I think it is a senseless way to pass your time and in some cases extremely offensive.
18. I have a police record.
19. Act now, think later or never......has always been my motto when executing things.
20. I kid myself that i can someday compose poetry like the English greats and stand shoulder to shoulder in the pages of literature history with Wordsworth and Keats (......my favourites....)
21. My dream garage would hold the following : MV Agusta F4 Serie Oro, Mclaren F1 LM, Rolls Royce Phantom and the Lamborghini Murcielago.
22. I am a die hard Mclaren fan and hence naturally abhor Ferrari. Mika Hakkinnen is my hero. I don't like that crooked faced Michael Schumacher even though he is, statistically, the greatest driver in F1. Have been involved in a lot of fights and arguments over this with countless people.
23. I have a problem with authority. All they do is try to pin me down. (Thats what i feel anyways)
24. Exaggeration for me is the essence of writing. Subtlety for now, is just the subtle variation in exaggeration.
25. I want my blog to have more visitors. But i also feel that advertising my blog is cheap and should not be done..........:D
I do not know if these are THE 25 things to be penned or whatever. But i leave it unto others to decide. Thanks Indi.
Friday, April 3, 2009
New Model, Original Parts.......
Well, that title does put you off, doesn't it? Sounds like another cheesy punchline.......which does not do anything to elevate the sense of urgency in you to go and grab a ticket to watch this one. Fortuantely, the prequels to this movie have done more than enough to ensure that the production and distribution costs are recovered at least twice over.
"The Fast and The Furious 4...........New Model, Original Parts."......sounds a bit uncool when put next to say, The Fast and the Furious, 2 fast 2 furious and The fast and the furious Tokyo Drift. The biggest problem for this film is going to be living upto the fame and charm of the earlier movies. Yes it has a lot of cars. And yes, Vin Diesel is back with the uber cool Paul Walker and the uber hot Michelle Rodriguez and Jordana Brewster. The amazing muscle cars featured here ('72 Ford Gran Torino....the baddy's car and the Chevelle SS....Vin Diesels ride.... look so amazing.....) and the romance with the japanese rice rockets continues (Nissan Skyline GTR, Honda NSX, Subaru Impreza...). But will it still blow my head off with the breath taking quarter mile drags, drifts, customisations and music from the first three parts? Lets take a look.
The story begins with another robbery.....obviously carried out by Vin Diesel and Family. A cameo appearance by "Haan" from Tokyo Drift and Paul Walker is back in FBI. And how ghastly does Paul look in a cheap FBI suit!!! I almost threw up! He was the one who made that whole street racer look so cool to so many million kids all around the world. Seeing him in that half ass suit was painful. Well, then Vins' girl friend, Letty is murdered by a drug dealer and this is the same drug dealer that Paul is trying to pin down. So their paths are set for a collision course, en route to finding their marker.
But the story isn't the appeal. The cars, the races and the tongue in the cheek humor are. And thats plenty in this movie. Be it the opening robbery sequence, then the race sequence in the city , the race to cross the border with drugs and the end sequence. All keep you on the edge of the seat. Proper FnF style. The soundtrack is not all that impressive. The music keeps fading in and out randomly, no new punchy songs. That was a let down. Also the editing on this one was weak. The movie could have been much more gripping, had the editing and the direction been a little better. Make no mistake though, Justin Lin has done his best as the director, but when you compare it to its elder brothers, it comes out as a bit of a loser.
Still, i would definitely recommend this movie. Its still cool, super cool. The cars, girls, drugs, dialogues, some emotions .....everything. Something that a automobile junkie should not miss. If you enjoyed the first three parts, then with a little more patience, you will definitely like this one too. And yes, it did blow my head off. Maybe not as comprehensively as the first 3 parts, but as a movie, yes.
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Just say "Oui"....wtf?!
This post is a little more profane and obscene than you might like it. So if you are not liberal enough, please do not proceed any further. And if you still have the balls to, do not blame me for the consequences.
There are some things that i have a pathological hatred for. French, the language, just happens to be one of them. It might be touted as the most romantic language ever, but thats just cause like all French girls, super models and prostitutes, its beauty is only skin deep. Have come to this conclusion after a long and hard epoch of farting, gulping gallons of water, cursing etc etc........ Let me put this into a small little story for you.
The earliest ancestors or should i say, the progenitors of the French were two males. Which directly makes them homosexual. But thats just a fact to state. More of an eulogy to the French. The more important point here is, each of these cunts had one sense missing out of the total 5. The first man, called Jacque was a deaf dimwit and the other , Edouard was a blind half ass. Now since neither knew nothing else except sexual innuendo, gestures and acts, they decided to invent a language.
Hence, Jacque the Deaf wrote the words (with the alphabets stolen from somewhere) and did not care to know how would any son-of-a-......... (well, let me know of one animal that the French do not tear apart and eat with a voracious appetite) pronounce it. And the other dickhead, Edouard (he could not see his head.....he was blind....:D) just blurted out whatever came to his mind, without caring to ask Jacque what he had pen-puked on the wall.
And so came to be French, a language whose written words and spoken words have no connection what-so-fucking-ever! And to add some puddle to the shit pudding, the French people are proud of it......yeah sure.........as proud as they are for inventing the guillotine.
The French population, might have originated as and when Jacque and Edouard, tired of fucking each other, broke off and went and humped some real girls from the neighbouring countries. A success of their charm and bravery, you see, which carries on unto this day.
So, i love the Paris postcards, with the Eiffel Tower and the Louvre and also the skimpily clad beautiful girls that have made this country famous (other than its vast and deep history). But thanks to Jacque and Edouard, i despise their language.
There are some things that i have a pathological hatred for. French, the language, just happens to be one of them. It might be touted as the most romantic language ever, but thats just cause like all French girls, super models and prostitutes, its beauty is only skin deep. Have come to this conclusion after a long and hard epoch of farting, gulping gallons of water, cursing etc etc........ Let me put this into a small little story for you.
The earliest ancestors or should i say, the progenitors of the French were two males. Which directly makes them homosexual. But thats just a fact to state. More of an eulogy to the French. The more important point here is, each of these cunts had one sense missing out of the total 5. The first man, called Jacque was a deaf dimwit and the other , Edouard was a blind half ass. Now since neither knew nothing else except sexual innuendo, gestures and acts, they decided to invent a language.
Hence, Jacque the Deaf wrote the words (with the alphabets stolen from somewhere) and did not care to know how would any son-of-a-......... (well, let me know of one animal that the French do not tear apart and eat with a voracious appetite) pronounce it. And the other dickhead, Edouard (he could not see his head.....he was blind....:D) just blurted out whatever came to his mind, without caring to ask Jacque what he had pen-puked on the wall.
And so came to be French, a language whose written words and spoken words have no connection what-so-fucking-ever! And to add some puddle to the shit pudding, the French people are proud of it......yeah sure.........as proud as they are for inventing the guillotine.
The French population, might have originated as and when Jacque and Edouard, tired of fucking each other, broke off and went and humped some real girls from the neighbouring countries. A success of their charm and bravery, you see, which carries on unto this day.
So, i love the Paris postcards, with the Eiffel Tower and the Louvre and also the skimpily clad beautiful girls that have made this country famous (other than its vast and deep history). But thanks to Jacque and Edouard, i despise their language.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Glimpses.....
Words overheard, mistakes seen.......something that human senses pick up during a normal day in life.
A teenage girl living away from her parents. Conversing with her mom on phone, at around 10 in the night, with a mischievous twinkle in her eyes and a wonderful smile on her face..."Mamma....mujhe aapko kuch batana hai. Maine aaj kuch kiya. Dantna mat, kaam achcha hi kiya hai. Nahi, mujhe kuch nahi hua, main bilkul thik hun.................... "
A friend to another, "I have lived sarcasm for 10 years. Thats just something you gotta remember. And bear........."
Some professor to his students, "All of your jokes start and end on filthy sexual innuendo. Just listen to that Russell Peters guy......"
An IT professional to another over a glass of mastani, "Dude. Introducing some bugs in the code is no big deal. Helps you stay credible, cause you can claim the credit.........."
A young man to his lady love, "Don't worry dear. And don't ever doubt our relation. Am here to be with you. Even if you leave me, i am going with you............."
A Tyre shop owner and some random acquaintance of his.
The Acquaintance : Arey bhadya, majhe 70 rupaye kadhi denar bey?
The Owner : M*******d, yedya bh*******........adhi majhe 30 rupaye parat kar.
A lady shop owner to her seemingly arrogant son (in Marwadi......have to specify that cause i cant understand some of it and can write none of it...) "9 months in the womb, 20 years of providing and taking care. And all you care to shower your mother with is curses.............."
One senior citizen to another, "Elections again. I will be missing my son, daughter-in-law during that time you know. They give you 400 bucks per head to vote. Just count the number of candidates in your ward................"
A cursory smile, a fleeting frown, a nod of the head.... and you are on your way.
A teenage girl living away from her parents. Conversing with her mom on phone, at around 10 in the night, with a mischievous twinkle in her eyes and a wonderful smile on her face..."Mamma....mujhe aapko kuch batana hai. Maine aaj kuch kiya. Dantna mat, kaam achcha hi kiya hai. Nahi, mujhe kuch nahi hua, main bilkul thik hun.................... "
A friend to another, "I have lived sarcasm for 10 years. Thats just something you gotta remember. And bear........."
Some professor to his students, "All of your jokes start and end on filthy sexual innuendo. Just listen to that Russell Peters guy......"
An IT professional to another over a glass of mastani, "Dude. Introducing some bugs in the code is no big deal. Helps you stay credible, cause you can claim the credit.........."
A young man to his lady love, "Don't worry dear. And don't ever doubt our relation. Am here to be with you. Even if you leave me, i am going with you............."
A Tyre shop owner and some random acquaintance of his.
The Acquaintance : Arey bhadya, majhe 70 rupaye kadhi denar bey?
The Owner : M*******d, yedya bh*******........adhi majhe 30 rupaye parat kar.
A lady shop owner to her seemingly arrogant son (in Marwadi......have to specify that cause i cant understand some of it and can write none of it...) "9 months in the womb, 20 years of providing and taking care. And all you care to shower your mother with is curses.............."
One senior citizen to another, "Elections again. I will be missing my son, daughter-in-law during that time you know. They give you 400 bucks per head to vote. Just count the number of candidates in your ward................"
A cursory smile, a fleeting frown, a nod of the head.... and you are on your way.
Friday, March 20, 2009
Ich kenne ein bisschen Deutsch..........
Entschuldigen Sie.........I am sorry, it does not mean i am swearing at you (which by some measure is my default behaviour). Its just that the effect of learning German has not sparred any of the senses. Its exhilarating to say or to feel. You get to be a kid and to some extent you have to be a small kid to learn a new language.
The repetition, colour pencils, songs, home work........its just amazing fun. But well it isn't exactly doing great things for my Englisch.....oops English.....was what i meant.
Attempting the GRE means having the 50 word lists down pat. At least thats what is expected when you book your seat. And all are not exactly easy. Some words are really alien and no matter how many tips and tricks you employ, your mental faculties just stubbornly refuse to register.
And here is where it gets interesting. German isn't exactly a close cousin of English. Much more cognitive with Sanskrit. Which makes things worse. In other words, the only thing in common between these two languages is the script (and a few words) and...............nothing else.
Nevertheless, as i have already said, its huge fun. Its like your imagination has earned wings the size of Madagascar! Every new word learned, be it German or English, is something new earned. For life. Which is why, i won't like to have it any other way.
Two languages, two different directions. More accurately represents how life goes most of the times. A choice every few steps. Where the paths meet, is for you to decide. For me as of now, German is a hobby and English is a lifeline.
P.S.: I realise that this babble is going to far. Some important and useful details then. There IS a Max Mueler Bhavan in Pune, contrary to what a lot of people feel. Their courses are recognised by all German Universities and hence highly sought for. Cost more than twice of what is being offered outside, but thats not exactly a stumbling block. The quality of tutors and the method of teaching is more than worth the price. As i have said twice, its huge fun.
The repetition, colour pencils, songs, home work........its just amazing fun. But well it isn't exactly doing great things for my Englisch.....oops English.....was what i meant.
Attempting the GRE means having the 50 word lists down pat. At least thats what is expected when you book your seat. And all are not exactly easy. Some words are really alien and no matter how many tips and tricks you employ, your mental faculties just stubbornly refuse to register.
And here is where it gets interesting. German isn't exactly a close cousin of English. Much more cognitive with Sanskrit. Which makes things worse. In other words, the only thing in common between these two languages is the script (and a few words) and...............nothing else.
Nevertheless, as i have already said, its huge fun. Its like your imagination has earned wings the size of Madagascar! Every new word learned, be it German or English, is something new earned. For life. Which is why, i won't like to have it any other way.
Two languages, two different directions. More accurately represents how life goes most of the times. A choice every few steps. Where the paths meet, is for you to decide. For me as of now, German is a hobby and English is a lifeline.
P.S.: I realise that this babble is going to far. Some important and useful details then. There IS a Max Mueler Bhavan in Pune, contrary to what a lot of people feel. Their courses are recognised by all German Universities and hence highly sought for. Cost more than twice of what is being offered outside, but thats not exactly a stumbling block. The quality of tutors and the method of teaching is more than worth the price. As i have said twice, its huge fun.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Thanks for existing.........
Yeah, this post is exactly what it says. You will understand what is going on.
A great mano cornuta for my favourite band Metallica......for this song......if I would not have heard and seen this song.......i would be a very different person today!
A mosh pit owed to Rage Against The Machine......for their fire and zeal....to use metal for something more than entertainment!
A huge bear hug to Opeth for restoring my faith in people's song writing capabilities.
A great round of high fives to Iron Maiden......for showing me what live energy is al about!
A bow down to Dream Theater......for letting me realise what exceling really means!
A full death wall to Lamb of God for showing me how hard work pays off and what high speeds actually mean!
A salute to Slayer......for showing me the difference between speaking of the devil and being the devil!
Appellations galore to Alter Bridge......for the realisation and the appreciation!
A headbangers ball to Brute Force for giving me a favourite band here in Pune.
And last but definitely not the least.............this song for.......sustaining existence!
A great mano cornuta for my favourite band Metallica......for this song......if I would not have heard and seen this song.......i would be a very different person today!
A mosh pit owed to Rage Against The Machine......for their fire and zeal....to use metal for something more than entertainment!
A huge bear hug to Opeth for restoring my faith in people's song writing capabilities.
A great round of high fives to Iron Maiden......for showing me what live energy is al about!
A bow down to Dream Theater......for letting me realise what exceling really means!
A full death wall to Lamb of God for showing me how hard work pays off and what high speeds actually mean!
A salute to Slayer......for showing me the difference between speaking of the devil and being the devil!
Appellations galore to Alter Bridge......for the realisation and the appreciation!
A headbangers ball to Brute Force for giving me a favourite band here in Pune.
And last but definitely not the least.............this song for.......sustaining existence!
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